condommodel: stop being cute you live far away
♂ = I am a boy who has a crush on you ♀ = I am a girl who has a crush on you * = just delete your tumblr already æ = Post a picture of yourself $ = You’re awesome # = I love your blog @ = You’re beautiful + = i hate you. % = You’re ugly <3 = I want to fuck you & = I wish we were close ~ = I wish we were friends in real life ? = I relate to a lot of the same things you go...
haroldisdumb: we could be married and i still wouldnt text u first
sometimes i forget that a lot of you have never heard my voice and i wonder what kind of voice you picture me having omg
jumbaco: if you didnt have an avril lavigne phase youre a liar
jaseherondale: childrapist666: edwad: jaseherondale: Did you know that in Australia it’s five times more likely that you’ll pick a partner based on humour rather than looks so if you’re ugly but a hilarious motherfucker then you’re almost guaranteed love yea but have u ever seen an ugly australian i am waiting for an ugly australian to add their selfie to this post pls do it is...
ruraljackdaw: psilentasincjelli: ruraljackdaw: voyagesofabookworm: thatwhoviansynesthete: wearejohnlocked: hungarian: do british people have a special £ key on their keyboards how do you hashtag ?????? hashtag is over by the enter key don’t you worry your lil butt wait what… what do American keyboards look like then? oh
lxvf: slightlysalty: Did you know that high school students today have about the same anxiety levels as insane asylum mental patients during the 1950’s? fun fact
voozu: in Australia they call blow jobs “gobbies” gobbies
i can’t even play hard to get i’m already hard to want
Never get too attached to anyone unless they also feel the same towards you,...– (via kitchen-magick)
deodrant: i dont understand how some fries can be longer than the average potato
arkhams: hey … so,.. uhh… (looks at notecards) did you uh did …you fall out of heaven because um (drops cards) shit fuck oh god fuck im so sorry youre-youre just s o.pretty i m soryr
Distance taught me how to love someone stronger.
disneyprincest: i hate when you voluntarily tell your parents some information about your life because you think you can trust them and then they bitch at you for it like congrats you have guaranteed that i will never tell you anything ever again
If you 'miss' me.
lisaanguyenn: Don’t just sit there and wait for me to talk to you, cos 99% sure I won’t. Don’t want to seem mean or anything, but yeah. If you miss me, then show it. Talk to me, and tell me, but don’t just say the words, ‘I miss you,’ and then not continue the conversation or anything, ‘cos that’s bullshit. If you miss me, then spend more time with me. If we stopped talking, change that. I...
bigger-0n-the-inside: peachhhh: tumblr is the only place you’ll find teens with the lowest self esteem who still think they’re better than everyone else a delicate balance of narcissism and manic depression. Bless.
draconisblog: tumbledore-: The best super power ever has to be the power to refill things. Think about it, your glass is empty, refill it without getting up. Your bank account empty, power to refill it. Your bed is empty of a person of your preferred gender, refill it and have some fun. At first I was all: Well that’s the stupidest thing I ever heard. But then I was all like: GENIUS! PURE...
me trying to tell a story: so yeah like, he said, or no, wait, first she was like.... i don't remember, but it's not important to the story 'cause... wait, yeah it is, but, i don't know man, it was just weird you know 'cause.. i don't know
infinityc0re: *showering* *not hot enough* *turn shower knob 1/16th of an inch* Satan himself pours out of your shower head and licks your back seductively
mikapus: acceptable ways to say the word ‘yes’: yes ye s eyse yES ye unnaceptable ways to say the word ‘yes’: yesh :3